knitting and the life I almost have around it

Saturday, September 02, 2006

catch me if you can

No, I have not fallen from the face of the earth. I am however, out on teaching prac :p

I'm at the same high school I went to! It's a bit strange, I'm aware that i changed a fair bit after i graduated and that the perceptions my old teachers have of me may be a little too generous. But I'm pretty stressed at the moment so maybe I'm being too hard on myself. I certainly tried alot harder in high school than i do at uni...
I've been observing this week and then getting home and collapsing! I've been questioning whether this is what i want to do a bit. I'm not unhappy in the classes - I'm learning names and feeling more comfortable in an assertive role - It's more the social side of the faculty that's making life a bit challenging.
My mentor is lovely - very organised, which is a wonderful relief! And she's very helpful and wants the best for me. On the other hand getting alot of feedback right at the start when I've only just started to feel what my role is... well it's a little intimidating. She's been giving me excellent advice on getting a job in the future - apparently it means sucking up big time while on prac so that people remember me when i'm making my applications next year! This is making me panic a little - what if I can't sell myself to a school? I'm not really the type to blow my own horn (those of you who see me gloat about knitting on a regular basis - that is entirely different!). And the uni tells us that prac is about making mistakes and learning from them but I feel like I can't breathe without worrying someone will take it the wrong way!

In knitting news:
My shawl is nearly finished! I only have to put on a moss stitch border (I've even woven in the ends already!). Unfortunatly, I have to spin the yarn for the border first. Its some lovely black alpaca carded with white silk that I bought from this eBay seller. It's divine but somewhat messy - and i find myself eating bits of sdilk for huors after i finish spinning. Because I've used so much colour i feel i need something black to anchor it all a bit.

My current stress levels have induced a little startitis, but I've found a nice remedy (for a while anyway). I have rather a glut of 50g and 100g bags of dyed fibre and skeins that have recently been dyed fibre. It's all lovely (and very enjoyable to spin) but hard to find things to do with it all - they are very small amounts. So in a fit of nesting I've started knitting some mitred squares! They show off the colour changes nicely. Unfortunately garter stitch is fairly inevitable, but at least they are quick little things and i get to wallow in feeling clever while i knit my own yarn! And I can dream of draping the final throw (yes taph, I'm probably hallucinating) over the lounge, or draping it over me when I knit or read in cold weather in the new house.
I suspect I will have a few problems when i sew it all up as i have quite a range of colours - from brights to pastels. I think it will be ok if i group similar colours together - so I end up with a blended change across the throw. I might also do a black border and weave black satin ribbons through the increase eyelets to get a sort of chequered appearance. I am dealing with several different guages, which I know I should avoid... we'll see. Maybe finer guage ones will be cushions..?

Sherpa's green socks are coming along slowly. I only get a little car knitting done in the mornings, I hope to finish them before prac ends - he needs new socks!

I have more knitting news but I'm fading a bit. Woke up this morning, the long-awaited weekend! And I have a cold. Sigh.

The run-down
Ms Spider xo

PS. I really want to come to thrusday SnB but it's the same night as the social at my prac school... and i should offer to go along. ugh. We'll see, I might plead mental health... I NEED MY KNIT SIBS!

PPS. I might add some photos after I've had a nap..



  • At September 02, 2006 6:12 pm, Anonymous Anne said…


    My experience of TP in the UK was that it's something that you grit your teeth and get through - yes it was probably the most exhausting year of my life (even including the year when I had new-born and a 2 year-old) - but it did pass.

    It's great if you can get a job at the school where you do your prac, but it's not the end of the world if you don't. And once you've qualified the whole relationship with colleagues becomes very different. All of a sudden it's a lot easier to ask for help as they don't need to worry about whether or not they should "declare" it. (Don't forget that it's not a terribly easy role for them either - most of the dept won't have had training in how to support you...)

    Stick with it - I love teaching!

    And I can't wait to see your shawl. Black alpaca with white silk... yum!

  • At September 02, 2006 9:45 pm, Blogger Sometimes Unwilling Guru said…

    Yes ,keep it up,I have been friends with some Prac students at school if only to make them feel at home,a smile and a chat goes a long way(as gardener I am deemed invisable at times,at the discretion of the head boss)

  • At September 03, 2006 11:00 am, Blogger Taphophile said…

    Courage, ma soeur de tricot. :) No one knows if they've made the right decisions at uni and it's as scary as hell first time out. I'm still waiting for someone to discover I'm a useless fraud even when there's evidence to the contrary.

  • At September 03, 2006 12:17 pm, Blogger Jejune said…

    Hang in there sweetie :) It's bound to be overwhelming for a while... it must be really weird to be back at your old school!

    Looking forward to seeing your mitred squares (I'm a fan of them too - they look SO tricky and clever, while being so simple to knit), and The Shawl.

    Hope you're getting some rest and TLC for that cold. (((hugs)))

  • At September 03, 2006 9:57 pm, Blogger Bells said…

    ms Spider you're braver than I am. I signed up for teaching several times and always pulled out. You're doing great, I'm sure, and just asking yoruself entirely reasonable questions!

  • At September 05, 2006 5:21 pm, Blogger kylie said…

    of course we want to see you on thurs and i was going to say something supportive like 'but we understand that being part of your schools extracurricular activities is important' but then i thought about the school socials i actually went to as a student and i think you could make a very good case for not wanting to recreate post traumatic stress disorder all over again. dont you think? (sorry thats not very supportive i know).


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